Alone Again

I think I have finally accepted that I am alone, that my relationship did not work out.

It was a nice dream for a while, though.

Since figuring that out I have :
Offered to take over my mother’s care
Enrolled in school
Applied for a bigger apartment
Been accepted into a townhouse, moving in a few weeks
Spent buckets of money on Christmas.

I would rather be alone. I am a more efficient person on my own.
I need to test in and start classes.
I need an education, not a man.


2 thoughts on “Alone Again

    • Yes, I have heard that. There seems no bigger test of that theory than when you love someone who no longer loves you. It really brought home that I am not ready. I might never be ready, but I would rather be happy alone than frustrated while trying to find someone.
      I don’t think it is courage, though. I think it is acceptance. I accept that I fall in love easily. I accept that I don’t have make any decisions at all when it happens, or even disclose it to anyone. Falling in love is not magical, for me. It is serial. I think I have put far too much weight on it previously.
      It does not have to be a big deal. It does not mean anything more than what meaning I assign to it.

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